Pansies are for Thoughts
Pansies are for Thoughts
20 years ago today, I got a call from someone I knew many moons ago, but only by face and name. A mutual friend told him I lived not too far away and suggested he get in touch.
He was reluctant thinking I was looking for a husband. She assured him I wasn’t.
Happily single, good job, my own house and car, a dog, good friends, a brand new niece; the last thing I wanted or needed was a relationship.
During our phone call it became apparent he was also happily single.
I just had a patio installed in my yard that resulted in a pile of sod needing to be moved. Not wanting to pay someone to do that, I took as much to the curb each garbage day as the city would pick up, but the pile never seemed to shrink.
During our phone call he mentioned he had a pickup-truck and lived in the country. Oh what a wonderful combination! I invited him over for a beer. I didn’t mention the sod.
We sat on my new patio chit-chatting for hours, me subtly mentioning the sod, until it started to get dark. He said “well I better get going”.
He and his pickup left, and I was still looking at a pile of sod a neighbour finally helped to make disappear.
A couple of weeks later, (probably after driving by to make sure the sod was gone) he called again “can I take you for dinner?” I accepted.
Just before our first anniversary, I was awakened by a phone call from Scotland with news my Great- Aunt had died. I was her only relative she still associated with and she had asked me to take care of her final wishes “when the time arrives for me to leave the departure lounge”. Less than 12 hours later we were half way across the Atlantic.
Our first anniversary was the day after my Aunt’s funeral. We were still in Glasgow and I showed him the town, the street I lived on before immigrating to Canada, and a few of Glasgow’s awesome pubs.
Phones weren’t smart yet, so we had a little 35 mm camera. We spent our first anniversary posing in front of Glasgow's many sites and asking passers-by to snap our picture. We returned to Canada looking forward to getting our pictures developed, only to discover there was no film in the camera – something we still giggle about today.
20 years later, we’re still walking partners. This anniversary was to be celebrated in the Scottish Highlands, and this evening spent sat in awesome seats at Edinburgh's Tattoo. COVID quickly cancelled any hopes of that happening, and the weather forecast for the next couple of days has postponed a little lakeside get-away we had as “Plan B”.
The sod and the pickup have long gone and we’ve been alongside through the illnesses and death of our mums, one of his siblings, our own illnesses, job challenges, death cleaning and more stories than any book could hold.
We’ve travelled, made new friends and countless wonderful memories. We even survived being quarantined together! Gracefully blessed and grateful the tears that flowed from laughter far exceed those shed from sadness.
His answer about why he didn’t offer to take the sod?
“I knew if I did I’d never see or hear from you again”. Smart answer.
Lorraine Cowan is a Certified Life-Cycle Celebrant & Ceremony Officiant who creates and officiates Rituals and Ceremonies for Life's Passages.
Certified Life-Cycle Celebrant
Authorized Wedding Officiant (Quebec)
Ordained Metaphysical Minister